Snicker, Snicker, Snort, Snort (Uh, huh.) Part Ichi

Once I get posting I can't stop, huh?

I found this snazzy random question feature while editing my profile.

Your bow is not broken but you've run out of arrows. How can you fake being a bard?

First, I need to know what a bard is. Okay, so I've figured out what a bard is, but I have no idea what it has to do with arrows. Maybe I'll grab a stick write BARD in the mud and draw arrows pointing to me? I don't even know

Well, maybe they don't need them, but don't you think that some fish might like a bicycle?

I know I like my bicycle. I don't know how similar my interests are to that of a fish, but bicycles are pretty hard to not like.

You've just inherited a manufacturing plant that specializes in plastics. What are you going to make?

Plastics or money, most likely.

When you spilled the milk, did it look like the moon?

If it did, I would spill milk more often, because the moon is nice looking.

If you drive on a parkway why don't they make the whole plane out of that?

Because you're not trying to drive on the plane. You're trying to fly it.

What was the stage name of your favorite actress before she was born?

I don't have a favorite actress.

Chicken monkey shoes?

Yes, please.

Compose the lyrics to a new national anthem that features an animal sound at least once:

Quick, what sounds do moose make?

Aren't papier mache cuts the worst?

I'll believe you if you say they are.